Cat Training Plan Recommendations: How to Handle Cats That Never Seem to Settle

Building Trust with Shy or Fearful Cats: A Gentle Four-Stage Approach

For cats that are not very affectionate or are afraid of people, online advice often recommends methods like "confinement training" or "forced petting". However, these approaches can cause significant stress for cats.

In this article, we provide a simple and easy-to-understand four-stage training guide that is friendly to your feline friend. Our method helps you build a deep and meaningful bond with your cat through low-pressure interactions.

Recommended Approach: A Step-by-Step Progressive Method

The key to building a cat's sense of security and establishing their core territory begins with a gradual, step-by-step method. Although most cats seem to progress slowly at first when following this approach, in the long run, they tend to warm up to people faster and feel more at ease.

One way to implement this method is by using either a three-tiered cage or a single room to house the cat. Of these options, we strongly recommend using a dedicated room, as it is kinder and more comfortable for the cat. Within this safe space, provide secure hiding spots such as a closet or cardboard box, along with food, water, and a litter box.

Allow the cat to gradually adjust to their new environment; this period should ideally last at least 2 to 4 weeks. Only after the cat has become accustomed to their surroundings should you begin training efforts to build closer bonds and reduce distance.

Less Recommended Cat Training Methods

A somewhat forceful approach involves placing the cat inside a cage or wrapping it in a towel to prevent escape, followed by gentle petting (plus tasty treats). Approximately 10% to 20% of cats can be "tamed" using this method, with kittens generally having a slightly higher success rate than adult cats. For cats that respond to this approach, noticeable progress is usually seen within a few days to a month.

This estimate is based on over a decade of personal experience in shelters, foster homes, and trap-neuter-return (TNR) programs, as no relevant literature could be found at this time. The main difference between this method and the ones described earlier lies in the higher degree of coercion imposed on the cat. In fact, it is often just a step away from what is known as the "flooding method", or sometimes can be considered the flooding method itself.

The flooding method involves the highest level of aversive stimuli combined with preventing the cat from escaping. It remains a popular practice among more than 90% of Taiwanese cat trainers despite being very unfriendly and stressful for the cats.

Our Recommended Training Program

Stage 1: Setting Up the Environment and Building Your Cat's Sense of Security

1. Provide multiple hiding spots where your cat can completely disappear and feel safe—not just partially hidden, but fully out of sight.
2. Avoid seeking out your cat, looking at your cat, or touching your cat.
3. If your cat comes out on its own, be sure to pretend you don't see it. Staring or making eye contact can scare the cat.
4. Be patient and wait. This phase can last anywhere from a few days to several months, depending on the individual cat's temperament.
5. Graduation from this phase occurs when the cat willingly comes out by itself and feels safe in the environment, spending most of its time outside hiding.

Creating Multiple Hiding Spots for Your Cat

Providing multiple hiding spots for your cat is essential for their comfort and well-being. However, it's important that these hiding places allow your cat to completely conceal themselves to the point where they cannot be seen.

Cats naturally seek out safe, secluded spaces where they feel secure and protected, especially when they are stressed or want to rest undisturbed. Simply having a covered space isn't enough; the hiding spot needs to be fully enclosed or shielded so your cat can retreat completely out of sight.

By offering a variety of fully concealing hiding options around your home, you can help your cat feel more at ease and promote a happier, healthier environment. Consider using covered beds, boxes with limited entry points, or repurposed furniture that provides total visual seclusion.

Don't Seek Cats, Don't Watch Cats, Don't Touch Cats

It might sound straightforward, but it carries a deeper meaning when reflecting on the human relationship with nature and boundaries.

In many cultures, cats are beloved companions known for their independence and mysterious charm. Yet, this phrase suggests a philosophy of respectful distance, emphasizing the importance of not intruding on their space. This can be interpreted literally, as advice to avoid disturbing stray or wild cats, or metaphorically, about respecting boundaries we encounter in life.

"Don't seek cats, don't watch cats, don't touch cats" implies a mindful approach: sometimes, it is better to coexist peacefully without interference. It reminds us that curiosity must be tempered with respect, and that some aspects of life are best appreciated from a distance.

In practical terms, this message can serve as a guideline for dealing with unfamiliar animals to prevent stress or harm to both humans and animals. It also speaks to broader life situations where respecting others' privacy and autonomy is essential.

Ultimately, this saying invites us to pause and reflect on when presence is enough and when action might do more harm than good.

Stage 2: Distance Desensitization

1. We generally recommend prioritizing actively rewarding your cat for approaching within a certain distance. Initially, you can set the distance at two or three meters, which will give you more opportunities to reward. Toss treats gently in front of your cat—keep your movements small and calm so as not to startle them. Once your cat consistently reaches this set distance, you can slightly increase the difficulty by shortening the distance by about 20 centimeters.
2. If your cat is comfortable allowing you to approach closer, you can begin placing treats by hand or with a long spoon at the closest distance your cat tolerates. Start by trying a distance of around 40 to 50 centimeters. If your cat shows signs of fear such as curling up, extreme restlessness, flattening ears, hissing, low growls, or swiping with claws, it means you are too close—please step back. Suitable treats include Ciao fish sticks, Ciao meat paste, Nisshin's kaiseki cat treats, Royal Canin BC34 or K36 cat food, or any treat your cat loves. You can conduct multiple treat-placement sessions throughout the day, but always prioritize keeping your cat relaxed. When your cat accepts the treats at the current distance, try moving closer by 3 to 5 centimeters.
3. Spend plenty of time gradually closing the distance. Rushing to get too close all at once can overwhelm your cat and actually slow down progress. Keep in mind that a cat's trust can be shattered in an instant.
4. When your cat is comfortable taking treats directly from your hand, spend several days at this stage. This is an important "save point", allowing your cat to fully feel safe and secure accepting food from your hand. If progress is pushed too quickly afterward and your cat becomes scared, you will need to return to this point and start again.

Stage 3: Touch Desensitization

1. Begin by gently touching your cat's cheek with your finger, then immediately give a treat. Once your cat is comfortable with this, gradually apply a little more pressure when touching, followed by another treat. The training sequence should progress as follows: chin, in front of the ears, top of the head, and behind the ears. Spend several days slowly and steadily helping your cat get used to being touched by a human, always pairing the touch with treats.
2. After your cat is comfortable with being touched on the head, move on to the neck, back, and the area in front of the base of the tail.
3. If you were originally using a three-level cage, during this stage you can allow the cat to come out and live in the room. To do this, place a set of food, water, litter box, and hiding spot outside the cage. Leave the cage door open and avoid staring at the cat. This helps prevent the disruption of the cat's familiar resources.

Stage 4: Advanced Training (Holding, Nail Trimming, etc.)

1. For all future progress, including training your cat to be held, nail trimming, and other tasks, you should follow the method described above: consistently implement "small incremental steps" paired with "positive rewards". Avoid trying to achieve everything in one go, or advancing your cat's training without their consent when they are not paying attention (e.g., holding them unexpectedly). Doing so may cause your cat to lose their sense of security.
2. If you need step-by-step instructional guidance, you can refer to our hands-on training themed courses and grooming care themed courses. If the training plan is going well, you should notice your cat becoming gradually more calm and reassured.

If your cat becomes increasingly insecure and starts scratching or hissing more often, this indicates that your training method is incorrect. Please return to a level of training where your cat feels comfortable and start over.

Using incorrect training methods can cause your cat to become extremely fearful, actively aggressive, or frightened to the point of urinating or defecating involuntarily. This fear and distrust can last for months or even years, causing your cat to remain unapproachable.

Proper hands-on training will never make your cat anxious or cause injuries to people. If your cat is very aggressive or extremely fearful beyond what you feel capable of handling, please feel free to contact us for assistance in working with you and your cat.

Some Training Tips and Details When Working with Cats

Sometimes, at first glance, two trainers might seem to do exactly the same thing, but the cat will only accept one person approaching or touching it. Let's explore whether some subtle details have been overlooked!

• Eye Contact: Avoid staring directly into the cat's eyes with wide-open eyes. Instead, try to look at the cat with relaxed, half-closed eyes or use your peripheral vision. You can also accompany this with slow blinking.
• Body Posture and Angle: Avoid bending over and looming above the cat's location. Do not approach the cat head-on. Instead, try to approach from the side and keep some distance between your body and the cat.
• Hands: Avoid reaching over the cat from above. Approach at or below the cat's face level, keeping your hand closer to the ground. During training, gradually increase the level of contact according to the cat's acceptance—there is no need to rush.
• Your Mood and Nervousness: Are you afraid of being scratched or bitten by the cat? Take a few deep breaths first and calm yourself before approaching. Cats can sense whether a person is nervous or relaxed.
• Slow Movements: Any action near the cat should be slow and deliberate. Don't be impatient or panicked. Even if you drop something, don't rush to pick it up quickly. Everything should be slow—even your breathing.
• Soft Voice: Open and close cage doors or handle objects quietly to avoid sudden noises. When speaking to the cat, use a gentle and low tone of voice.
• Give the Cat Choices: Observe how the cat prefers to be approached—by whom, from what angle, and what kind of interaction it enjoys. Building a relationship by catering to the cat's preferences results in the fastest progress with no pressure on the cat.
• Smell: Keep your scent as neutral as possible. If you have recently interacted with unfamiliar cats or dogs, wash your hands and even change clothes before engaging with this cat.
• Distance: Constantly be aware of both your body-to-cat distance and hand-to-cat distance. Keep your body at a comfortable distance for interaction, and keep your hand just outside the cat's pressure threshold—usually a few centimeters away.
• Treats, Toys, and Catnip: Leave a small treat or something nice for the cat during each interaction or approach, but don't invade its safe distance just to feed it. The safe distance decreases naturally through positive interactions, never through forced adjustment.

How to Gently Use Eye Contact with Cats

When interacting with cats, it's important not to stare at them with wide-open eyes. Instead, try to look at your cat with relaxed, slightly narrowed eyes or use your peripheral vision so your gaze is softer and less direct. This approach helps to make your cat feel more comfortable and less threatened.

Additionally, you can complement this gentle eye contact by slowly blinking your eyes. Slow blinking signals to cats that you are calm and not a threat, which can strengthen the trust and bond between you and your feline friend.

Body Posture and Angles When Approaching Cats

When approaching a cat, it is important to be mindful of your body posture and the angle at which you move. Avoid bending over and looming directly over the cat's location, as this can make them feel threatened or intimidated.

Instead of facing the cat head-on, try to approach from the side. Keeping your body turned slightly sideways and maintaining a respectful distance will help the cat feel more comfortable and safe during the interaction.

By adopting a gentle and non-threatening posture, you increase the chance of building trust and positive communication with the cat.

Choosing the Best Way to Approach Your Cat

Cats have their own unique preferences when it comes to how, from which angle, and by whom they like to be approached. Understanding these preferences is key to building a strong and trusting relationship with your feline friend.

Observe how your cat reacts to different types of contact or distances. Notice if they prefer gentle strokes from above, slow hand approaches from the side, or if they favor interaction from specific people. By tailoring your approach and interactions to what your cat enjoys, you show respect for their boundaries and personality.

When cats do not feel pressured or overwhelmed, the bond between you can develop much more quickly. Taking the time to let your cat choose the way they engage with you leads to a happier and more confident pet, and a more rewarding relationship for both of you.

Understanding Distance When Interacting with Cats

Distance: Always be mindful of the distance between yourself and your cat. This distance can be divided into two types: the distance between your body and the cat, and the distance between your hand and the cat.

For body distance, the focus is on maintaining the farthest distance that still allows for comfortable and effective interaction. When it comes to hand distance, it is important to keep in mind the few centimeters before the point where the cat begins to feel pressured or stressed.

Being aware of these distances helps create a positive and stress-free experience for your cat, fostering a better relationship built on trust and comfort.

Building Trust with Your Cat Through Treats and Toys

When interacting with your cat, whether it's during playtime or simply approaching them, it's a wonderful idea to leave a small treat or another appealing item like a toy or catnip behind. These little positive reinforcements help create a pleasant association with your presence.

However, it's important not to invade your cat's safe distance just because you want to feed them directly. Cats have their own comfort zones, and respecting that boundary is key to building trust.

The safe distance between you and your cat will naturally and gradually shorten over time, but this happens only through positive, stress-free interactions — not by forcing them to adapt.

By patiently offering treats and toys during each interaction, you help your feline friend feel safe and appreciated. This approach fosters a trusting relationship that strengthens with every gentle encounter.

Conclusion: Respecting Cat Training Methods

Respecting your cat's natural learning process often proves to be the fastest and most trouble-free way to train them. While the so-called "flooding" method may appear quick and easy to learn at first glance, it is usually more harmful than helpful to cats.

Training that honors a cat's temperament and individual pace tends to build trust and produce lasting results, without causing unnecessary stress or side effects. Patience and empathy truly make all the difference in effective cat training.